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When even my laid back sympathetic open mindedness isn’t enough

She googled “Artists in Staffordshire” and my name came up.

I’m still not quite sure why, since I don’t live in Staffordshire.

But, nevermind, work is work, and I know people find me from various places.

She chose me because she bought the house she currently lives in from someone also called Adshead, and the name seemed familiar to her.

She found my artwork on another site and liked what she saw.

We spoke a couple of weeks ago and she told me what she wanted.

A drawing of herself, in the nude, but discreet. As a present for her husband to celebrate their first year of marriage since Paper is the wedding anniversary gift for one year.

What a wonderful gift, I told her. Ideal, and different, and totally apt!

She came to my house yesterday to discuss it further. And to pose for me.

I showed her other pictures I had done, of other women in the nude. I talked about my huge experience. I talked about past drawings and paintings I had done of other people. I talked of the reasons why they wanted their particular pictures doing. I talked about nervous people I had drawn who felt afterwards that it was therapeutic to be drawn by me. I talked about my various and many experiences. I talked about how open minded I was. I talked about how used to seeing naked people I was. I talked about the fact that naked people are the same as a vase of flowers/bottle of milk/house in my world and I treat them all as objects to be drawn regardless of what they are. I talked about the fact that all women look beautiful. I talked about being comfortable in your own skin. I talked about all manner of things to make her feel relaxed.

But none of them were enough.

She just wasn’t happy taking all her clothes off for me.

To be able to draw her.

Which made the fact she wanted a nude drawing of herself slightly more difficult to achieve.

But……

She is happy to send me photos of herself. In the nude.

Which helps enormously.

But in a way I feel I’ve let her down somehow.

Because, I’ve never had this happen to me before.

I can usually calm people with their experience of posing nude for me.

They find it a positive and uplifting experience and feel happier within themselves that they have taken that difficult and challenging step to disrobe and pose for me.

But, this one didn’t.